Congratulations!

I'd like to take this time to congratulate my foes from across the aisle. Today is the culmination of all the hard work the Christian right has put in the last few years on the gay marriage issue, yes, today is the today the President of the United States will stand up and pay you lip service. Savor it, I would.

President Bush will come out today (not a pun) in favor of a federal ban on gay marriage in a speech that is no more than a back-handed slap to your face. So, have your wife dig out her old wedding dress and prepare yourself for that march on to the Senate where a sham vote will occur on Wednesday. You've earned it.

While you are basking in this glorious victory, I would like you to take some time out from your celebration to ask yourself, "Why exactly am I against gay marriage again?"

It's one of the few conservative arguments that I just don't even begin to understand. Virtually all of the arguments against gay marriage are spurious at best, yet there you are cheering the fact that you support this bigoted legislation. You have to be thinking to yourself that you're not bigoted, so why do you support it? Is it because somebody told you to?

I am for allowing homosexuals to marry each other. The reason? I believe that all Americans should be entitled to equal rights in this country, and this ban certainly disenfranchises a portion of our population from a set of distinct legal rights that you and I are free to enjoy. That's not right.

What I believe about marriage in general is that it is a religious rite. However, you can get married in the most opulent church in the country by the most pious of men and your marriage isn't worth squat in the eyes of our government unless you procure that little piece of paper from whatever local agency handles marriage licenses in your area, and that is the crux of the issue.

Gay marriage has absolutely nothing to do with whether your church will recognize them, or even perform the services, it's all about being able obtain that little piece of paper. It guarantees gays the same legal benefits that you and I get, and it doesn't have anything to do with religion. It's simply a legal writ that binds two people into one financial entity. One that in this country as often as not requires a judge to undo.

This is the part of the issue in this country we need to move past. A marriage is really just one form of what some states have passed called civil unions, and I certainly don't see any reason any two people shouldn't be allowed to enter into a civil union for financial reasons. In fact, you can. Most of the financial benefits enjoyed by married people can be attained though a lengthy series of legal documents, the IRS being one notable exception. Certainly a conservative can see the argument of simplifying the process by eliminating a lot of government bureaucracy, right?

So now I must ask you, "Why exactly are you against gay marriage again?"